I feel more connected with my mom when we laugh together, when we hug each other, when she enjoys eating something delicious. This creates an intimacy that allows us to communicate at the level of the essence. No words are needed..
When I was young I was too busy with my life and my complaints about my mom that I couldn’t see who she really was. The irony is that now I know her, wonderful, generous, big hearted woman with a great passion for life. I feel so much love and appreciation for her.
The way the relationship is unfolding as time passes and the disease progresses, has made me reflect on the big questions about life and accepting death as part of life.
We have the general tendency to label everything that happens. Right or wrong, good or bad….But things are more complex than this dualistic view. No doubt that Alzheimer´s is a bad, hard, chronic, progressive and hopeless illness. NO doubt that to communicate with Alzheimer patients is so difficult and still surprisingly we can find other rich ways to connect differently and deeply: by touching, by hugging, by smiling, sometimes even by talking in Gibberish language. Is it good? Bad? Right? Wrong? What if we could stay neutral? Which is the richness that’s waiting for us as soon as we stop judging and labeling situations?